Do you seriously think women weren’t objectified and exploited by men before feminism came along? Women were essentially treated as property for hundreds of years before the suffragettes came along. Rape was only seen as a crime insomuch as it was tainting another man’s property. Feminism was not started by men–men already had all the power they wanted over women!

I think you need to read up on some actual feminist ideas because you will quickly find that it is not about “acting like men” at all. It’s about the freedom to be “girly” or “manly” or neither. It’s about freedom.

Nope.

I am a feminist. Honestly, I would probably buy these girly legos if i still played with legos. I love pink and I’m super girly! Feminists have nothing wrong with girly stuff. True feminists are the first people to tell you that girls should be allowed to choose to be GIRLY, if that is what they want. The point of feminism is that women are people and deserve the same rights to choice and freedom as anyone else.

The frustrating thing about making girly legos is the assumption that girls need legos to be pink in order to be interested in them in the first place. It’s the assumption that in order to market to girls, we have to make the legos pink and fit an arbitrary standard of “girlhood”. It’s the fact that toy markets are very intentionally set up to keep “girl’s” and “boy’s” toys very, very separate in look and style. They do this so that to keep the market segregated and minimize competition. It doesn’t have to be done by gender, but they chose to do it that way because sexism. And so in effect, because of the way capitalism works, over time toys/children’s entertainment is pushed more and more into gendered boxes, which has a real effect on how we force gender stereotypes on kids. Because this is the way toys are marketed, we are more likely to confine kids to a narrow view of what “girls” and “boys” are supposed to be like and act like as parents who don’t know better keep buying these toys.

If you look at toys from 50 years ago, things were nowhere near as strictly gendered as they are today. And the only reason for that is because of an intentionally strict system of gender-based marketing strategy that effectively only further solidifies a narrow view of gender roles into our collective consciousness.

I don’t care if a little girl wants to buy pink legos: what I do care about is the fact that her parents may only buy her legos BECAUSE they are pink now. What I care about is the way marketing schemes are slowly manipulating and enforcing a strict and arbitrary gender code on future generations.

Um… Yeah. You hit the nail on the head. Women should be free to be as sexual as they choose, just the way that men are allowed to, without being called “hoochie” and “trampy”, and without it being done only on a man’s terms. Men should not be “sexing up” women, the only one who should be “sexing up” women? Are women who choose that for themselves. That’s the whole damn point: women are people and should be allowed to make their own choices.

Beyonce dances “hoochie” because SHE is in charge of herself, SHE is in control over her own body and her own sexuality, and SHE is allowed to choose that if she wants. She is making a statement about the way women are confined and the way “sexing up”, as you call it–or rather, a woman’s sexual choices–are taken away from her by the demands of patriarchy.

People like you who name-call and tear other women down because of what they choose to do with their own bodies and lives are the reason feminism is still very, very relevant.

No, white supremacists didn’t quote the bible. They twisted it to suit their motives. Many people do that. Let’s be logical. You’ve never had someone take your words out of context and use them for their own purpose? Just because someone twists your words, doesn’t mean your words weren’t true when you spoke them. Just because someone twist’s God’s words doesn’t mean they weren’t true when he spoke them.

Excellent response! Bingo!

But the “sexed up” ..everything.. is a result of feminism. Wasn’t it feminists who said women should be free to have sex without consequence (birth control and abortion)? Without being tethered to a man (unmarried)? They even promoted all the free-love stuff and were a HUGE factor in the previously-shunned bikini becoming a mainstay.

When you have well-known feminists like Whoopi Goldberg and Barbara Walters stating that Beyonce’s hoochie dancing is “art,” don’t talk to me about how they DON’T want girls living in a sexed up world. Women are free to be hoochies, remember?

Please. Feminists have never been about preventing the sexing up of women. They don’t want MEN to sex up women, but they can do it to each other. That’s fine.

I am sorry it has taken so long for me to reply. If “a feminist is someone who strives for justice, equality and choice,” then I really would have no problem being called a feminist. However, these are very general terms and what they mean to me is completely different than what they appear to represent for the feminist movement. For example, I believe the single greatest injustice that could ever be committed is the willful murder of a baby at the hands of his own mother, but the “movement” calls this a woman’s fundamental “right.”

Also, feminist claim to fight for “equality” yet I never see them fighting for equality for men.” In fact, in many regards women are already given preferential treatment. In more non-traditional roles, less qualified women are often given preference over more qualified males simply to meet quotas. Also, while feminist love to point out the fact that they make less on average, they ignore the data that shows fewer and fewer men are graduating school, male-on-male violence far exceeds male-on-female violence, the vast majority of inmates are male, the vast majority of the homeless are males, almost every “gender” quota favors females, in divorce women are more likely to gain full custody of their children and the list goes on and on. If we focused on these numbers it would be just as easy for men to make the case that society favors women.

Finally, regarding “choice” that is another “cliche” word that has infinite meanings and implications. We all agree that some choices are wrong and some are even reprehensible. Rape, murder, abortion and drug abuse are all the result reprehensible choices – choices that society must do everything to prevent. I believe that society should do everything it can to discourage these choices. Also, when I chose to get married and have children I understood that I was choosing to put my husband and children’s needs ahead of my own. My life was no longer just about “ME” and what I want. I would work if my family needed the money, but it is no longer about chasing my own dreams, it is about meeting the needs of the individuals my family. And amazingly enough, I have found the greatest joy placing the needs of my family ahead of myself!

Of course, I am not saying that women that choose to work are being selfish, but their reason for working should be to serve their family – not themselves. And if their work comes into conflict with their families’ needs, they should be willing to give it up.

Anyway, thank you so much for responding. I really appreciate your comments and encouragement. At the end of the day we all want the same thing – TO BE THE BEST MOMS WE CAN BE! We just have different ideas about how to get there. Thanks again.

I really don’t think women are “held below men.” In fact, in many regards women are given preferential treatment. In more non-traditional roles, less qualified women are often given preference over more qualified males simply to meet quotas. Also, while feminist love to point out the fact that they make less on average, they ignore the data that shows fewer and fewer men are graduating school, male-on-male violence far exceeds male-on-female violence, the vast majority of inmates are male, the vast majority of the homeless are males, almost every “gender” quota favors females, in divorce women are more likely to gain full custody of their children and the list goes on and on. If we focused on these numbers it would be just as easy for men to make the case that society favors women.

Feminism simply means that a person believes that men and women should have equal opportunities. I don’t know how you could disagree with that idea.

To say that feminists are completely irrelevant is ignorant when women who *want* to have opportunities are still held below men. If some women don’t want those opportunities, that’s fine and well, it’s their choice, but the point of believing that women should have those choices is the underlying premise for feminism.

Sorry, I’m having trouble getting the computer to play nicely.

In a world where Girl children repeatedly face worse health, education and well being outcomes than their male peers, to suggest that feminists are irrelevant is short sighted. To imply that feminists have done more harm than good is offensive to all the men and women who spend their lives working to make the world a better palace for girls and women and indeed the whole community.

I can’t seem to link to my IWD posts, but you can see them on my blog. Sorry, I don’t know why it won’t let me paste the link in.

I appreciate the mature and engaged discussion that you have had with your commenters so far, it is pleasing to see.